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What and Where is the Worth?

So much is written here and other places about the struggle of marriage. Sharing your life with someone – all of your life with them – is rough at times. It takes a lot of effort and thought, a lot of patience and kindness. But! it is also fantastic and absolutely worth all of the annoying, frustrating, tough times (if you’re in a good one). After I wrote the post on marriage not being the end zone, I received some comments abut how hard marriage seemed and how it doesn’t seem all that great from the outside. I think that happens because so much of what is talked about in mainstream society puts marriage as the happy ending, the goal to a successful life, the destination. You say your vows and roll credits – that’s a wrap! And that is 100% completely and utterly false. A wedding is a beginning not an end, and the road is bumpy and full of pot-holes and cliffs with no guard rails. But the views can be spectacular and I wouldn’t miss the pitstops for the world.


So what are the good things? What makes this whole thing worth it?

It is often in the small things, a hand on your thigh, on the small of your back, someone to dance with in the living room, a look across a crowded bar, waking up to someone every day.

It’s how Kamel makes me a better person, challenges me in all the right ways, doesn’t let me off the hook for things, knows me in a way that no one else does. We care for each other, we don’t let each other fail and sometimes that means holding each other to a certain standard and making sure we reach that standard. And I’m ok with that. If my marriage is all “Lauren, you best be nice! And not bitchy! And forgiving! And learn to praise people!” Then I’ll take it.

I also greatly enjoy sharing the business of life. UGH, MAN, the business of life! Is so! Exhausting!! Marriage and having a partner is awesome because now there is someone else to pay the cell phone bill and all my food doesn’t go bad because no one sells food for single people (which is really fucking annoying), and my strengths in life can be nurtured (like folding laundry and cleaning the bathroom), while my failures are as if they never happen (like taking out the garbage and doing the dishes) because I never have to do them again! Those are now someone else’s problem. MARRIAGE IS AMAZING FOR THOSE 2 THINGS ALONE. Life is complicated and having someone to take on some of that burden is a massive plus.

What else? Marriage is awesome because I genuinely really love hanging out with my husband. It is the greatest! I love spending time with him, he has made me laugh until I’ve peed, until I am crying hysterically, until I SNORT in public! He is always up to watch a movie or go for a walk (this one took some training) or explore a new part of any city.

My favorite thing about s is the complete lack of jealousy. I am also really proud of our willingness to grow as people, always moving forward. The silliness, we are silly and fun and the hard parts of life never seem that hard when we are doing them together.

There are so many great things, but it doesn’t mean it isn’t hard. It doesn’t mean I don’t cry or say things I wish I didn’t or sometimes wish I wasn’t married at all. It doesn’t mean that sometimes I really would like to punch him right in the nose. It doesn’t mean we always get a long.

ButI love him, I love our marriage, I am so grateful for this life that feels sometimes like it came out of nowhere. We are lucky and at the same time we work hard for what we have. The worth of our marriage is priceless as long as we stay diligent within it.

What are the great things about your partnership? What do you cherish the most about sharing your life with someone else? What parts make the hard parts so so so worth it? It’s important to brag every now and then. Boast about what makes you and your partner and the life you are building together awesome.


Marriage Is Not The End Zone

Yesterday’s post, though honest and fraught with the reality of my swollen hot feet and sweaty knee-pits, bothered me all day. I kept thinking about how it wasn’t the post I should have written. How the lightening storm was great, but it was actually a small piece to a larger puzzle. I thought all day and even into my happy hour with Claire about how to say what I want to say, but I am still coming up blank. Since we’ve moved to Seattle things have been good, I have been happy, we have so many opportunities here, we have a much better quality of life, there are a thousand and one excellent things about our world right...


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Year 3: Leather

People watching at fancy hotels is the best. Such a strange group of people. You realize that money doesn’t make you pretty and that humans are just humans, bathing suits and bellies and bottoms and tan lines and burn lines and hairy backs. And we all just want to get some sunshine, order a beer, and go for a swim. “Oh man! Look at that guy!” Kamel said, “He’s roasting! He looks like he’s smoked a thousand cigars. He looks like, he looks like…” The first thing that came to mind was the word “Tanning” …. but I didn’t mean it in the “lay out in the sun and get a...


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This weekend was one for the books! Staycation, celebrating our 5 years of knowing each other, and our first night away from Gabe! Last year for our anniversary we went to Target after work, got stuck in traffic, and then ate take out at 7:30 at night while the baby cried. This year we decided to treat ourselves and spent 2 nights at the Four Seasons Seattle. The weather just happened to hit 90 degrees on Saturday. It was at July anniversary miracle. The Four Seasons were kind enough to supply us with a real crib, complete with bumpers and sheets and a quilt. Plus all the Johnson and Johnson baby products you could ever wish for AND a...


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5 Years of Knowing

When I was pregnant with Gabe, Kamel and I would go on lots of walks. Frequently we would ask each other, “5 years ago could you believe this would happen? That you would be living here, married, and about to have a baby?” We would always say, “no way! no how! I wouldn’t have believed it even if future me came back and told me it would happen!” Five years. (A photo from July 12th, 2009) It’s not so long. Not as long as I have known my best friends. Only a fraction of how long my parents have been together. But 5 years of knowing, somehow it feels solid. Not so solid (but what is solid? 10? 30?), but it...


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Those Wide Open What-Ifs

Do you remember when you were a teen and reading books or watching movies and you’d think about your future and it was all possible? What would you be? Where would you go? Who would you date, marry, live happily ever after with? The world was full of so many firsts. So many big events. Sometimes when I read YA, and am put back in those teen romance angst years, I feel pangs of grief. I feel like this sounds crazy because who wants to go back to the angst? The angst took over my life, it was terrible, so many what-ifs, so many possible social blunders and hurt feelings and crushed hearts (99.9% my hearts). What am I mourning? Why do I...


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Who the hell is she?


I am a writer living in Seattle and I believe that life is a grand adventure and only boring if you believe it to be. Plus! You don't need money to have fun.

I live with my husband, a photographer by education and a maker-of-video-games by trade, and a baby named gabe in an apartment on the hill.

I am romantic about most things and I cry... about almost anything. I tell stories to entertain you, I spread stories to keep you in the loop. I am not a grammar freak, but I do know how to spell it. I am exceedingly proud of my scrambled eggs and I really could eat an entire pan of cupcakes. If I met me, I would be my best friend. I tend to be irreverent.

If you would like to chat with me or see what else I'm up to you can follow me on Twitter (betterinrealife), on facebook, or email me at betterinrealife at gmail.