Episode 38: The Challenge of Transitions – Part 2

Transitions continue to be hard for Kamel and I, even with all the practice we’ve had. Even with the compassion we attempt to bring to the table. Even with therapy, even with positive outcomes.

The hardest part of marriage, for me, is that there is another whole person standing next to you the whole time. This person has their own baggage, their own way of dealing with stuff, their own needs. That means part of my life now is responding to this other alien being who shares my house, my kids, my bed. Who shares my life. That’s hard. I really did hate Kamel through recording at least half of this episode. And when we stopped recording he hated me too. But then we were fine again.

Of the time we’ve spent being together here are all of the major transitions we have weathered:

-Lauren moving back to Seattle
-Lauren moving back to San Francisco
-Moving in together
-Commute and job changes
-Getting married
-Moving out of the city
-Adding that third tiny roommate
-More moves
-More job changes
-Moving back to Seattle
-More job changes including unemployment
-Second pregnancy
-Second new tiny roommate
-More job changes including unemployment
-Buying a house
-More job changes


Just kidding. We’re about to be married for 7 years in July. This is just the tip of the iceberg.

1 thought on “Episode 38: The Challenge of Transitions – Part 2”

  1. It’s so weird when you get married you don’t actually have a clue what you are signing up for and promising to stay with that person through. I always think about the Obamas’ interview they did in the Times (maybe??) where he said the most exciting thing about being married is the guarantee that your spouse will change and you get to watch them transform. Our biggest transition in marriage was my husband going to rehab and getting sober; it’s so difficult to let go of both our old selves and our old versions of other people in our minds. It has been a long transition for us. The unending acceptance and love in marriage through growth and change is always going to be challenging I imagine.

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