I have been slacking in my book-o-bundts project with the move and blahblah (no one wants to hear about the fucking move anymore, Lauren!). But I am back in bundt action!! This recipe called for some stuff that I didn’t do and some stuff that I modified. First, it called for espresso, but we are not coffee-flavored-things people. So I opted out of that one. Also this recipe was for mini-bundts and who has mini bundt pans just lying around? So I barreled forth with my 1 giant, normal-sized bundt pan and readied myself for the deliciousness.
First, this recipe was NOT AT ALL healthy. Like… wtf chocolate cake?! Two sticks of butter? Really? And butter milk too? Ps. Buttermilk is disgusting and I could only find it in a giant carton instead of one of those little ones heavy whipping cream usually comes in. So now I have a lot of buttermilk that I will eventually just have to throw out. But if it goes bad, who could freaking tell anyways? It’s gross regardless.
Remember how I mentioned 2 sticks of butter? Behold.
And because that’s not enticing enough:
I’ll give you a minute to wipe the drool off your keyboard. Om nom nom nom. I could have stopped right there and been a happy camper. Hi, I’ll just have the giant bowl of dark chocolate mixed with 2 sticks of butter, please. And can you rub it all over my body for me? KThanksBye.
To make this a “Mexican” chocolate cake, the recipe called for cinnamon and cayenne. The amount of cayenne was miniscule for my taste, so I doubled it (it still wasn’t like, a ton… I’m talking tsps here). There was also almond and vanilla extract. I ran out of vanilla so I added in more almond to cover it. A little a this, a little a that, badda bing, badda boom.
Add in a little baby, to taste.
Now here is where this delicious story takes a turn. So the mini-bundts, remember? The cooking time on them said “Exactly 20 minutes!!” (Exclamation points added for emphasis.) And I was all “fuck it! a big bundt is where it is AT!” Except… that when I cooked it for 20 minutes, the cake was clearly not done. So I put it back in for 10 more minutes. The “EXACTLY” 20 minutes thing was stressing me out though. What if it was supposed to have a gooey center? What if once it sat for 10 minutes after cooking it hardened up? I didn’t want to overcook it! Ahh! The stress of not following a recipe to its exact specification!
But look-it! So pretty! (And with new baking soda it rose beautifully FYI – so thank you for the tip on that!) And it smelled so good. Buttery chocolatey spicy goodness. Om nom nom. And it felt firm? Ya know? So I thought all would be well. Except…
… ker-splunk. Except, I probably should have cooked it for an hour. The middle was totally not cooked, which was ok as Kamel and I ate it with our fingers from the cooling rack. It was sort of like a lava cake. A delicious delicious fudgy lava cake. A lava cake that spilled all over our white tiled counters and got gooey chocolate in the grout. Weeeeee! A spicy chocolate cake of awesome that we basically just threw out. Womp.
I think this is my first true baking failure. Like, hi, I’m Lauren, and I didn’t follow the directions and then my cake didn’t cook and look at the big sad chocolate mess I made! But A for effort! And next time I’ll definitely cook it for an hour. I think that will fix all of my problems.
**If you would like the recipe to this (if you dig cinnamon and cayenne in your chocolate), email me!! It really was probably the best chocolate cake I have ever eaten and definitely the best I have ever made. Even while it slowly oozed through the slats and onto the tile.