I am in Vegas this week for work! Traveling alone is one of my favorite things. Being pregnant has made it a little more complicated. I am not as foot loose or easily transportable as I used to be, and being away from the normal routine for a week throws me for a bit of a loop.
All weekend I was angsting over being gone for so long, wrestling with the airport, the transportation, all the things I needed to do for work for the small amount of time I was here, what to pack, the weather, etc etc etc. But then, as soon as I waved goodbye to Kamel and got on my way, I remembered that I was totally fine and capable. Even though crawling into a van and lifting my luggage is a bit more difficult, I get tired much easier, and my expanding stomach is aching by the end of the day – I still got it.
I saw this commercial the other day where a woman was talking about life insurance and how she got used to making decisions with someone else and now she has to make them by herself (because her husband kicked it) and how she realized she as ok. Or something. There was a happy ending. And then I skedaddled and left home for a week. It got me thinking… right now Kamel and I are on the better end of figuring out how to make decisions together. We actually do pretty well, but sometimes we still want to kill each other. Sometimes I wish my life wasn’t affected SO much by someone else. But then I get into situations where being my own advocate is exhausting, always being the one to “handle the situation” or figure out how to get somewhere or being the only person to remember all the things. Sometimes that stuff super sucks, it’s true.
It’s really good to remember that I can be awesome as just me. As much as I say that I am, or think it in my normal life – it’s great to be shown that I can handle it all, struggles and annoyances, good things (room service in bed, HGTV, etc), all of it by myself. Yes I am married, yes I share my life with someone, yes I am carrying around a mini us, but ultimately I am me. And being with just me is nice.