The Republican National Convention is here and it just makes me laugh so much. I have outrage, yes… but the righteousness and the “we are doing god’s work and that’s the American way”- ness of it is just so effing over the top, that my outrage even makes me laugh. Because: are you kidding me pageant of finger pointing and “we love America more” and “we will never say the name of Bush ever again but we’re going to reference the “years before Obama” as equally bad” and “Real marriage looks like this” and “only God can make laws, government just enforces them” ? Because wow. What a crock of shit.
Dear fiscal conservatives: I am so sorry that your party has been hijacked by crazy people.
And yeah, I know that the DNC will be just as over the top and ridiculous with the fanfare and the balloons and the crazy fans in crazy hats crying about the perfectly sculpted sob story about how the president saved some person’s job by doing xyz and bailout bailout bailout. I know. But I’m pretty sure that Obama has my vagina’s back, is all I’m saying. Oh and ya know… he doesn’t pursue policy that actively limits the rights of people depending on who they love and fuck. So, there’s that.
I’ve been live tweeting the convention because… how can I NOT? It’s more shocking than the Oscars! So here are a few gems from the last two days.
Ann Romney: just keep telling yourself that. You fakey entitled lady you.
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 29, 2012
He doesn’t like to talk about how he helps others, because he uses it has another tax deduction.
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 29, 2012
Why does this convention remind me of the Hunger Games with all of the districts in their little outfits?
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 29, 2012
Oh jeez. Yes, bipartisanship… Mmhm I’m listening… This is why you are so much better than the other side? Yes yes I see…
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 29, 2012
Oh no…. Awkward Mitt sitting while everyone else stands…. Oh no … Someone forgot to pull the strings.
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 29, 2012
Oh god, I can hear him from the other room even. That ridiculously attractive weasel is…. Ahhhh! dont look directly into his eyes!
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 30, 2012
Oh god. The tractor beam. Its too late for me… Run, save yourselves.
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 30, 2012
…. Such pretty skin…..
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 30, 2012
Obama hates old people!!! Obama hates old people!!!
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 30, 2012
(he probably doesn’t but Paul Ryan has to find away to talk about Medicare)
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 30, 2012
DEFENDER OF MARRIAGE?!?! away with you homophobes. BE GONE.
— betterinrealife (@betterinrealife) August 30, 2012
If you would like to play along this evening, starting at 7:00 pm, I’ll most likely be on twitter. Ya know… being snarky and raging.
Also did you see that Fox News was one of the first to publish all of the blatant lies inaccuracies in Paul Ryan’s speech last night? Has something in the universe fallen off? Are we now suddenly spinning out of control? Who are you again?
The “dear fiscal conservatives” line had me spewing coffee out my nose, there. It’s very strange when our political systems (it’s so often the same up here in Canada, particularly on the conservative end of the spectrum) when we use the same words to describe our stances on fiscal and social policies, and a fiscal conservative and a social conservative often have very, very little in common except for that pesky conservative word.
Seriously.
My husband and I generally share political views: we’re both fiscally conservative (to a point) and socially liberal. To me, the social issues are most important, so I vote democrat. To him, the fiscal issues are … so he votes republican.
This totally used to be the case in our household. Until the Republicans swung further and further to the right and…and now F. definitely won’t be voting that way this year. (I also think this has something to do with marriage being front and center for us right now…and our friends who are attending our wedding who can’t legally marry.)
Agreed. I’m a social liberal and fiscally moderate-conservative. However my right to terminate a pregnancy because I was raped (or for any other reason…) is so fundamental that it trumps any fiscal issues for me.
I have thoroughly enjoyed your twitter rants (and those of other almost as witty people) – and I’ve re-tweeted that shit like cray. But I don’t have a TV and am sorely missing out on the LIVE action ridic!
I get so excited that GOP continues to shoot themselves in the foot, and then I get really sad when I notice they didn’t even realize they did it
I have been thoroughly enjoying your twitter comments. I had plans during the convention save the last one. I almost turned it on but decided I would just follow along on twitter instead. The twitter comments are entertaining and keep my rage levels down. I would probably have broken my tv if I had actually watched it. I hope you will be sharing your thoughts on the DNC too. I’m going to try to catch that one.