I am currently on a business trip in Houston, Texas… or The Most Inconvenient Place I’ve Ever Been. If this were a vacation I would laugh and roll my eyes and then sit outside somewhere, if I could find a place that was open, and drink many drinks in the warm and lovely humidity (which I actually like in small doses, turns out Houston’s weather is not at all my biggest gripe). And because I’m really tired here are just the highlights of the many inconveniences I’ve experienced.
- My hotel is 20 minutes’ outside of the city, which is no fault of Houston’s… but it makes this week of driving and figuring out the GPS and not crashing into other cars way more stressful than it should be.
- My hotel is a shit hole that’s trying to snazz itself up as some sort of extended-stay-all-suites-with-a-kitchenette-for-convenience thing. Could be convenient! But the loud as fuck (yet necessary) air conditioning, the water being turned off during the day, the construction, the flood-making fucked up shower head, and the gross-out factor (who killed a large bug while on the phone with Kathleen today? Me.) make this sleeping arrangement also really stressful.
- And then I had to go and whack my rental car into a curb and bend the wheel, deflating the tire, sending me into major panic-holy-shit-I-fucked-upness. Sobbing on the phone to Kamel while I choked out, “It’s allll my fauullttt,” has definitely been the highlight of my week.
- Then the new found anxiety of having to now drive on a spare tire to and from the office AND navigate new and confusing streets AND deal with a vague and shoddy GPS who keeps re-routing me even though I haven’t switched streets or missed a turn? That’s just icing on the gravy.
- Did you know that downtown Houston is a ghost town? Most of the cafes and shops close at 3:00 pm and I couldn’t, for the life of me, find a Starbucks. I’m not even THAT big into Starbucks, and I don’t drink coffee, but I feel like while traveling they are a beacon of hope in a sea of new and overwhelming options. I also can’t find a Walgreens or a CVS – both of which are so plentiful in San Francisco there are 2 on one block and 2 right across the street from each other. IT. IS. MARVELOUS.
You know what the best part of Houston is? THE PEOPLE! Everyone in the office is so lovely, my direct coworkers freaking make my DAY! And I’ve gotten to hang out with Rachelle twice already, and then today I’m going to a soccer game with her! And!! AND! I got to meet Becky! So for all of that, it’s been excellent… it’s just the other stuff that’s totally a traumatic pain in my ass. Oh Houston….