A Mental Hubub

My brain is all a hubub and it’s messing up my days… and nights. I can’t sleep! It’s been weeks now, with maybe only 1 day per 7 where I really feel rested. The rest of the time I’m waking up at 2 or 3 in the morning night from bad dreams or stomach aches or just waking up for no good reason at all except to lay there and wish for sleep. I’m clenching my teeth and fidgeting. Kamel, on the other hand, snoozes on. Snoring in my ear or flopping around like it ain’t no thing. He’s the worst with his uninterrupted slumber.

Last night it was too hot at first. So we ditched the comforter and opened the windows. Then what happened? Of course it got cold, so I poked Kamel awake (but he really didn’t seem to mind) and he closed the windows and got the comforter again. He, very shortly, began snoozing again. I just laid there, trying not to clench my teeth, worrying about my dental future. When I did drop off, I woke up again from bad dreams, sweaty and uncomfortable, with a Kamely squishing me against the wall. I blame him for all my discomforts.

He says it’s because my schedule is shifting, and it is shifting – but more on that later. He says that the thing a Lauren loves the most is a routine and when that routine is messed with a Lauren isn’t happy. Maybe this is true, but right now I’m just eye-watery and full of yawns with no time for naps and a long day ahead. Can I get a communal grumble? I’m going to go try and be a functional human.

17 thoughts on “A Mental Hubub”

  1. grumble on, lady!! Josh and I just moved in together (for the first time) in a totally new city across the country from our family and friends and I’m still without a job… my routine is totally cattywhompus and my sleep is suffering. glad to see I’m not alone!! xo

  2. ha, i was just gonna say that it might be the change in routine that’s making it difficult for you to sleep. last summer, i didn’t really have a schedule. i was working almost full-time for a blog and i didn’t have to be up at any particular time or anything, so i fucked UP my sleep schedule.

    isaiah is the same though. i’ll give a hell-yeah to obnoxiously capable sleepers with their knees and another hell-yeah to 60 lb. dogs who like to lay across your feet so you feel like you’re sleeping in a hotel – the one with the sheet tucked WAY in at the bottom? straight-jacket-style?

  3. I hope you are feeling better. Drink a lot of water, and just try to make yourself a schedule and follow it so you have a routine… and warm milk with honey is supposed to make you sleep.

  4. Oh, I have SO been there. When you can’t get to sleep and all you can do is watch this person so obnoxiously and peacefully and happily asleep beside you and resent, resent, resent . . . and then poke them.

    1. Oh man, it’s the WORST when they snore too! There’s nothing like the feeling of helplessness when I can’t sleep and Fred is snoring! It’s the ultimate distraction.

    2. I’m the easy-as-pie sleeper in my relationship and now I feel horrible. I don’t do it on purpose! I wish I could make C fall asleep fast.

    3. I realize I’m slightly lucky in that, while I’m the sometime-insomniac, my husband is the light sleeper so I know how easy it would be to ruin his night…but then if I accidentally wake him up when I roll over (seriously, I blink and he wakes up) he just goes “are you ok? Anything I can do?” and I kind of grumble no but feel better cause he’s so nice.

      I used to elbow my sister in the ribs all the time, but then she was one of those people who flail around in their sleep and hit you.

  5. Ry and I were JUST this morning talking about what a sound sleeper I am and how mad he gets at me in the middle of the night/morning when I’m dead asleep, have stolen all the sheets/blankets/pillows (I can’t help it! I’m a sleeping hoarder!) and he says sometimes he just sits up and stares at me. But not in the sweet loving way, more in the planning-my-demise way…

    If it helps- even though it takes earth movements to wake me in the night, I don’t sleep soundly AT. ALL. Because I snore, sleep-talk and have all to action packed dreams. I once karate-chopped my mom (obviously in my sleep) as she snuck into my room to give me a goodnight kiss.

  6. Donnie is super sick right now and so I slept in the guest bed last night so as not to contaminate the infants in my school. And it was the best night of sleep I’ve had in a long time. I feel a little guilty that I was so well rested without him, but… the truth hurts, doesn’t it?

  7. I feel your pain. My husband excels at falling asleep and I decidedly do not… BUT, because I know he’ll nod off to dreamyland in short order anyway, I don’t feel bad about having him help me fall asleep first. He either tells me all the minute details of his day or, if I’m *really* stressed and my brain simply won’t slow down, he reads to me. Historical fiction is particularly effective.

  8. I HATE insomnia. Hate it. I don’t get it very often, (I’m usually one of those people who can conk out hard and fast,) but when it does it destroys me. And, inevitably, it’s a night when it’s imperative that I get enough sleep, which makes me even more desperate to get to sleep. It sucks.

    On another thought, you might want to consider getting yourself a mouth guard. It’s unsexy, I know, and you drool a lot, but it’ll save your teeth. At 25, my teeth are nearly ground flat from years of grinding my teeth in my sleep. As I told my husband, which is less sexy, your wife wearing a mouth guard or your wife without any teeth?

  9. i’m grumbling alongside you. waking up in the middle of the night is the worst! (and the fact that i think that is argument enough against me ever having children)

    my least favorite thing is when my pager goes off at 4am. it’s so loud and abrasive and since i have to wake up at 5 anyway, it means i won’t be able to get back to sleep for any meaningful amount of time and i end up just getting up and starting my day. this happens much more than i would like and always makes for cranky days.

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