Tic….Toc

Waiting.

I have found, in my adult life, that sometimes everything happens at once, sometimes you are scrambling to balance it all, you wish you just had 5 more minutes (to sleep, to eat, to work, to think), sometimes life moves you so swiftly you can barely hang on to your hat, you’re being catapulted through space and time, you’re on the move whether you like it or not. And sometimes, other times, times that seem to take milennia… you wait. You wait for the deadline, for the call, for the answer, for something (anything!) to happen. You wait and suddenly waiting feels like a 2nd (or 3rd!) job. It fills all of the space between activities, it feels like you’ve never done anything before, like you never had the moments filled with movements, like you’ve gotten a full on college degree in Sitting and Waiting (it’s in the Humanities).

The Lauren-Kamel household is in the between. Between floors, between levels, between here and there, stop and go. We are in the waiting room. We are there together, patiently keeping each other busy, playing thumb war, flipping through old magazines, tapping our feet. My metaphor could go on for hours. I have all day.

Our weekends are filled with errands and meetings and all the things we should’ve, would’ve had time for if only. I am guilty because I didn’t do that second load of laundry, because I was too busy doing equally mundane things (eating bad chinese). We don’t have time for the adventures that used to fill the spots where I am now bored, because we are busy… with waiting.

We wait for the wedding, for people to return RSVPs, for people to call us back, for future possibilities (more to come on this later, you’ll have to wait). We wait for the mail, for the phone to ring, for paychecks to go through, for emails to be sent, for bills to come due. We wait on time and we wait to have time.

I have so many things planned, so many stories to tell, so many so many. But they are all out there, in the future. I am in the business of making my own stories happen, but not today. Not this week or this month. But the month is almost over, it’s right around the bend, things to say, I can feel them. Just wait a little bit more and we’ll get there.

13 thoughts on “Tic….Toc”

  1. “…it feels like you’ve never done anything before, like you never had the moments filled with movements, like you’ve gotten a full on college degree in Sitting and Waiting (it’s in the Humanities).”

    Haha. I love this sentence. I have that degree. With a minor in Hoping and Praying and an emphasis in While Trying to Look Busy.

  2. Oh, have I been there. But it has to be there, cushioning and padding all your stories. Uncomfortable though, right? I know!

  3. “You can get so confused
    that you’ll start in to race
    down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
    and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
    headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
    The Waiting Place…

    …for people just waiting.
    Waiting for a train to go
    or a bus to come, or a plane to go
    or the mail to come, or the rain to go
    or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
    or waiting around for a Yes or No
    or waiting for their hair to grow.
    Everyone is just waiting.

    Waiting for the fish to bite
    or waiting for wind to fly a kite
    or waiting around for Friday night
    or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
    or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
    or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
    or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
    Everyone is just waiting.

    NO!
    That’s not for you!
    Somehow you’ll escape
    all that waiting and staying.
    You’ll find the bright places
    where Boom Bands are playing.”

    Oh Dr. Seuss, how I love you. (The Waiting Place in Oh, the Places You’ll Go!)

      1. One of my all time favorite books, somehow full of so many lessons for life. You’ll be done waiting soon! I just know it 🙂

  4. Hah. I’m waiting for work to end to send you an email that also mentions waiting. There’s a lot of it around here too. 😉

    I’m not *that* much of a hippie, but I have read enough about numerology to know that some years are waiting years, and other years are everything comin atcha years. Last year for me was numerologically a waiting year, something I wish I had found out ahead of time so I would’ve stopped pushing and shoving trying to get things moving, and smelled the roses a bit… And this year? Things are supposed to start moving, but we’ll see. Stupid juju bullshit. 🙂

    1. Um, I love that. And since I just turned 26, if this is a waiting year that would explain a lot. If it’s not a waiting year, then maybe it’s just a little slow on the uptake. 😉 Or maybe it means the year year… not birthday year? Either way, how do you find out??

      and also – WOO EMAILS.

  5. “We don’t have time for the adventures that used to fill the spots where I am now bored, because we are busy… with waiting.”

    We’re preparing for a wedding too and YES THIS.

  6. Can I just say that waiting for the RSVPs is one of the worst types of waiting there might possibly be. I almost can’t handle it. Patience has never been one of my strong points.

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