It’s My Party

Man this week has been caa-raazy. I have been invited to so many parties this week and then i went and decided to throw one. If you weren’t invited, don’t feel bad. The partying that was happening this week was only for very exclusive people. I was surprised to actually get the invite, see, because usually these parties just involve one person and go by the underground code word of pity. Pity Parties. Get it?!

Is this national “I feel sorry for myself because the ecomony is bad and life sucks” week? Because I need warning next time. Here is how the week went down: Tuesday surprised the hell out of me by being one of the longest days of my FUCKING life (for various boring work related reasons).

Then wednesday rolled around and I decided to start the day off with a positive attitude that quickly melted to complete despair. I was hoping for a cheer-me-up email from the Margaret, but she was struggling with her own (not so) funemployment demons over in her new town of ithaca, which IN TURN had me thinking about my own career-empaired dilemmas and by wednesday afternoon I was in a full on “what am i doing with my life” mental meltdown. This lead me to take a 2 hour ass kicking walk through San Francisco leaving me both hungry AND exhausted. Not a pretty picture for Kamel when he got home (late) (grumblegrumble). I thought a good nights sleep may cure me, but then at 2AM I woke up with racing thoughts and that was the end of that. Plus I kept having the covers ripped violently from my shivering body… ahem.

Thursday rolled around reluctantly, complete with me not wanting to get out of bed. When I did finally don my outfit and head out the door I was immediately confronted by the fact that my car no longer had either of its license plates. Or the screws that hold those license plates so firmly to my car. Awesome. Police were called, reports were made, and I got a directive to go straight to the DMV and RE-PURCHASE my license plates. Thanks for the big Fuck You, universe. Hearing you loud and clear. (Can you feel the party starting? Can you?) I brought my iPod to work, so I could feel less like jamming a spoon into my eye while I scanned files in a tiny room for hours. And I felt like I was on an upswing until I realized that all three of the girls are now working, full time, in their professions and I, of course, am not. Wahh wahhh! And then Claire started texting me in the afternoon and she was right in the middle of her own pity party about relationships and the lack of “we” in her “me”. These of course sucked me right in and pretty soon, while telling her how much she DID have, I realized how very much I didn’t. By 4PM I had decided I had no meaningful present, no future to speak of, no friends, and nothing fun at all happening in my life. OH THE PITY. It’s a snowball of doom I tell you! A party full of people arguing over who has it worse.

And so now it is Friday. And things are better. The sun is shining and I’m wearing pink pants. I’m hoping the weekend will be party-free, a party-free zone one might say, full, instead, with productivity and contentment with what we all do have, etc etc. (Insert more Oprah grateful talkyness here) I’m just hoping I can stop hearing sad trumpet sounds wherever I go. Wahh wahhhhhhhh.

6 thoughts on “It’s My Party”

  1. My week has been hell too- some of the same thoughts- except i am running away to a cabin today at 4 for the weekend with the boy. but let me tell you, i feel ya and hear ya LOUD AND F'ING CLEAR.

  2. "The Margaret"? I am the Margaret? Hmmm. Maybe if I change my resume to reflect that people might realize my importance and give me a job? 😉

  3. oh well, you're FOR SURE "THE" margaret in my life. not to be confused with "THE" atwood. See what i did there? See who you are on the same plane with? Oh yes. That's right.

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